Fischerspooner - Cloud
listen to the above! cheerful but it matches my mood. go amo for recc'ing them :)!
but to bring it down a notch-
for a while now, i've not been reaching deep enough for myself.
everything that is me feels unfocused, i'm facing no particular direction. it's the one thing i'm quietly worried about, on the times when i let myself think about it - why don't I have any driving force?
what I once called a pro of my personality is now something that i'm faintly concerned about. i'm flexible and casual... or is it just indecisiveness?
as a 'young intellectual', suddenly i'm wondering wether i'm selling myself(mostly just my brain, frankly) short. all the things others say around me, to me, for me... it's all washing over and I feel affected, yet unmoved. for the better or worse.
i'm trying to find my centre.
my views on what happiness really means is usually a strong feeling for me. A little rattled currently, i'm sitting and considering this dusty sheen settled on my emotions, and feel quite annoyed at the sensation of feeling lost.
here I am setting out what I think again, clearly.
things holding measures of happiness:
1) things I like to do. typically, activities where I can't focus on other stuff. this is sometimes big brother, or videogames, knitting, reading, cooking etc.
2) in relation to thinking of future things, remember research shows you statistically don't become happier once your income level reaches a certain point. That point is typically where you can have a comfortable life for yourself and your possible family, incl. a handful of life-indulgences.
3) time spent with friends.. self-explanatory.
4) find or maintain the reasons for living that are bigger than just me. love of someone special, child, friends, your family, yourself as a person. or making a world difference.
or do I just sound hugely sheltered and trite?
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3 comments:
i agree with your happiness points completely
im sad to hear that youre feeling a little displaced!! thats not good! :(
related to yr 12 in any way? i was feeling like this last term... it sucks :(
hrmm but yes i am saying that i think i understand where youre coming from and if theyre anything i can do to help you please tell me!!
i shall lend the IT crowd next week okay hon!!
love much to you dear!
love amo xoxoxoxoxox
i'm not on the edge of desperation as it were, just feel like i'm searching for something... if I were gods girl then prayer would help... so I pray in my own way, and it's helping.
it's the environment... i'm just ajusting to change and stuff :)
LOVE YOU! aww man you kick ass xxxxx
i relate to a lot of the stuff youre saying about trying to find something more and needing direction and stuff. i imagine most people would feel like that every now and then.
it's good to have stuff you enjoy and love and stuff that makes you happy, all those happy moments are what you need to keep going.
hm i don't know, i have this idea that theres probably not going to be anything outside of yourself that can definitely change the way that you feel and are, and that your happiness is all up to yourself mostly. it's like its all in your mind kind of. like in the movie the pursuit of happiness, you can't expect to find something better all the time that will make you happier, try to accept how things are and be happy like that, in the moments with the people you love.
sorry this may not be relevant to what youre feeling lol.
but you're awesome lauren, stay beautiful you'll have a beautiful life :)
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